Hideaway to Highway

Feelings from the first month in Mexico:

I'm in Mexico.

I'm in Mexico and I should be having the time of my life.

I'm in Mexico and I don't think I want to be here.

Or at least I didn't think I wanted to be here. I felt that coming to Mexico was a hide away for me. I felt like I was hiding from responsibilities, from heart breaks and headaches, hiding from stress and problems. Hiding from my confusion and indecisiveness, from uncertainty and from feelings, both negative and positive. I felt like people saw me and my situation as running away from problems, as avoiding responsibility, as not being able to move forward with my life.

Mexico was my little hide away. I was hidden from my past life and distant from all problems.

And I hated it.

I hated thinking that I was running, that I wasn't progressing.

Then I attended church and taught a lesson to a group of people who hardly knew what I was saying.

I made solo trips across a Mexican state.

I ate things I didn't even know were food.

I joined a gym.

I set goals.

I spoke to strangers in a language I don't know.

I learned so much and I loved so much already, and I realized that this doesn't have to be a hide away, but it can be a highway for me.

I'm on the highway to being who I want to be, to improving myself, to seeing improvement in others. I'm on the path to more fully becoming who God desires me to be. I'm on the highway to becoming more responsible and independent.

Because I'm not stagnant.

I can't change what people think of this trip of mine, but I can change my own views. I know that my happiness and progression are not based upon my location in life. They solely depend on me and my attitude and determination.

Mexico is no longer my hide away from problems, but my highway to becoming better.

So thanks, Mexico.